How to Determine If Your Date is an Axe Murderer

The Canadian Christmas

2006-12-24T15:07:00.000-08:00

Well, it seems as though I should do something Canadian as I'll be going to New Zealand so soon! (Feb 10!) I've done le ski nordique, and will have to do le tobogganing, and le ski alpain soon. It'll be fantastic and these holdiays have been great so far.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

As stolen from Rabe who stole it from Mare, who stole it from Willis who was is original...

2006-08-15T10:45:00.000-07:00

A is for Age: 19. My lab crew has decided that I'm an "innovative kid".
B is for beer of choice: clearly its TNT... or 8K brew... actually Corona
C is for career: N/A
D is for your dog's name: No dog... but I've named the cows we experimented on!
E is for essential item you use everyday: so much soap!
F is for favorite song at the moment: definitely have about 30 favourite songs so will go with Keith Urban "Somebody like you"
G is for favorite game: game eh? Ho-DOWN!
H is for home town: Wazzupinthefortsideyo?
I is for instruments you play: Piano, oboe, guitar, recorder, french horn, and my voice!
J is for favorite juice: orange and lemonaid
K is for whose ass you'd like to kick: my own
L is for last hug?: my MOM!
M is for marriage: Well if I was one of the grad students in my lab i'd have a profile up on some matromonial website... maybe I should look into that.
N is for name of your last ex: oh this is complicated
O is for overnight hospital stays: none I remember
P is for phobias: SO much sadness!
Q is for quotation: "Live to the point of tears" Camus
S is for status: alive?
T is for time you wake up: 7 am weekdays, 7 am weekends I love my life and all the studying that goes along with this blasted exam. eff!
U is for underwear: underwear is so overrated. I don't understand why we don't just all go commando! Off topic, I am wearing Sponge-BOB underwear!
V is for vegetables you love:almost all!
W is for worst habit: i definitely exaggerate about 200 times a day.
X is for x-rays you've had: i've had my extremedies, but then when I was little and sick they made me drink radioactive barium and exrayed my entire digestive tract to check for leaky gut! But I don't have a leaky gut... which is so much good news.
Y is for yummy food you make: i can't cook
Z is for zodiac: Saggitarius... I'm bringing sexy back.

I got lost!

2006-07-30T19:52:00.000-07:00

And I lost my way in life, particularly from this dumb blog. But here we go again. As I sit here in beautiful Oliver, BC (!!!!!!) with Hayley encouraging me on I once again find a lack of important things to write about.

Let me at least tell you all what I did today. Hayley and I got up, made some damn good French toast and then went out hiking the Golden Mile Trail just up the mountain of Tinhorn Creek Winery (which is up the mountain from Hayley's orchard). So we started off with probably too much enthusiasm as we decided that "real" hiking is for wimps, and thus decided to free-style some cliffs and rock formations. We went south first and saw some really good views of Osoyoos (and the USA). We then decided to go past this old mill and over the creek and finally began the Golden Mile Trail. It should be noted that the trial was not one mile, but 10km and this was after doing a few hours of freestyling. It was a fantastic trip, and Hayley pulled out all the tour guide (her summer job) info and we both felt intelligent after taking biol 208, that's right Bill Tonn! Both of us had severe attacks of ADD resulting in her chasing various Ents for her 400-Ent class and me trying to take pictures of us looking like we were jumping off of cliffs (inspired by Eric). There were some pretty good ones in the end, thank god for the digital camera.

This morning started off well with a good hour of Organic Chemistry. The MCAT is now LESS THAN 3 WEEKS AWAY. Which is causing me undue stress, and I'm about to go into Beckie-is-stressed mode. But not yet. When it does happen everyone will know.

And now Hayley is back and we're going to do some more slave labour and then go minigolfing down in Osoyoos. I really cannot complain, plus I've got some mean tanlines now! Somehow I can already feel that the lab is going to hurt a lot on Wednesday.

I'm out!

2006-02-09T12:15:00.000-08:00

Sitting here, nothing going on. Just thought I'd update because I hadn't in a while. Anything new? To be quite honest, not at all. Same old- not getting enough sleep for various reasons, homework is intense, although I'm enjoying all of my classes except for physics. Laptop boy has a name and a girlfriend, so that's that. Genetics boy, who I'm actually friends with in triathalon club is introverted to the same extent that I am extroverted. Then there are preppy immunology boys #1,2, and 3 but I don't know anything about them yet, except that they are very metro and quite possibly have more hair supplies than I do.

To be quite honest, I'm not this ditzy, nor do my thoughts centre on matters of such little importance. But it is amusing.

I'm a TF for Orientation 2006 and we went to camp last weekend which was teh amazing. haha that's the first time I've ever written teh on purpose. It sould be a fantastic time!

Running makes me high!

2006-01-26T19:43:00.000-08:00

I don't think I've felt this way in a long time... at least since Tuesday... wait yesterday! But its great!

I Love Running! and Swimming! and Biking!

AKA. I love triathalon club.

And I'd like to close by thanking my good friends, the endorphins. You make life worth living.

Back again, and back at it.

2006-01-20T20:57:00.000-08:00

Christmas break was great! Amoung other things, my family went skiing at Sunshine which was fantastic. Rabe and I found lots and lots of powder by skiing almost out of bounds.

This term my classes are turning out to be hottastic if I do say so myself. Of them, IMIN 200 is apparently the most related to my degree. Wait! It is my degree in a 200 level class. Our prof doesn't understand technology especially microphones, computers, and powerpoints. This has proven to be a slight problem since his lecturing style requires a subtle combination of all three. Physics is my arch-nemesis again and fluids, fields, and radiation, may just cause me to increase the dose on my anti-ulcer medication. (no joke). Genetics 270 is taught by the squeeky-est prof I've ever had. She's really good until her voice suddenly jumps three octaves. Psyco is obviously dumbed down science for soc/anthro students hehe...(I'm not complaining). And then my personal favourite: the "dramatic readings" my Ecology prof does as he tries to imitate an Oxford accent (he's from Boston).

More fun, I've officially joined the Triathalon Club and they are HARDCORE! Its so much fun, and the people are all really nice. But there is the gleam- I've seen it before. Its the x-country hardcore gleam when they think about running all the way to Jasper Ave. and back in 45 minutes (9km?) Mind you its got about 4 massive hills spanning the deep deep river valley. They get the gleam in their eyes, and it goes with the gleam radiating off their tight running pants with the relflective material. And then I show up with sweats. I continue to impress.

On another note, Mare and I have decided to start a Radical political party with an extreme agenda. More on this later. We plan to have a Chancellor and have divided up the ministries what we are more than confident will be an able cabinet. Too much time, not enough to do... wait. I'm supposed to be going on 3 pub crawls and 3 parties tonight (slightly overbooked), but I'm sick and now heading to bed with my Harry Potter.

After I'm done with Harry Potter I plan to read:

Plague wars. by Mangold
The man who mistook his wife for a hat. by Oliver Sacks.

What? You're calling me a nerd? Well you said it, not me!

Goodnight!

I know a classy girl.

2005-12-20T22:42:00.000-08:00

She studied like crazy for all her exams. She wrote Biology 201: Eukaryotic Cell Biology today. Finishing about 30 minutes early, she took out her "water" bottle and was drunk by the time she handed in the test 20 minutes later.

The amount of stress I've delt with has been completely ridiculous. Hopefully the cycle of drugging myself asleep and awake every day can now stop. I hate relying on chemicals to live my life.

I'm so excited for Christmas!

Keep a watch out for the 22nd. Possibly Rabe and I will pull off something fun ala last year but even better!

The race is on!

2005-12-09T12:46:00.000-08:00

Basically for the next 10 days its me vs. the clock as I try to learn as much as humanly possible about Genetics, Biochemistry, Microbiology, Eukaryotic Cells, and ... Physics. I wish there were only 3 or 4 classes. Who decided on 5? Plus 11 hours of labs! and 2 hours of seminars! Instead of 15 hours/week, its suddenly 28! In the words of a certain Marshall Mathers I know "How the f*ck did this metamorphisis happen? In any case, they didn't ask me!

Mark has mono. If you're in any of my classes, please go and make out with him, you know... take one for the team! help me ride the curve!

Hope things are going well with all of you.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire!

2005-11-18T19:48:00.000-08:00

Midterms have come and gone 4As and one B, and once again, I find myself on the prowl.

There's a very cute guy in many of my classes that looks like Seth Cohen (from the OC: nerdy = hot). He always types his notes onto his laptop, and thus has earned the very imaginative nickname "Laptop- boy" amoung my genetics/eukaryotic cell/microbiology friends. Maybe I'll do something really daring- like sit beside him- next week. [For an extroverted girl, you're really pushing it rebecca] haha.

So I'm officially 19 on the 22nd. Whoot. I don't think I'll go and get tanked a la last year (which was even less classy because Monday (my birthday last year) is not exactly the standard drinking day). Maybe we'll go out for supper, so keep posted, I can't promise treat bags.

And the big news... HARRY POTTER! Came out last night, but us lucky Lister (Residence) people got to go and see it early at 7pm. The acting is improving steadily, and I think that they did a really good job getting a 700 page book into a movie of acceptable length. I won't say what was cut/what was good, because I know that some of you *ahem* Diane *cough* would strangle me, but sufficie it to say that I was very impressed, and will be going to see it again soon. Maybe when you get back after exams, Diane??? (HINT! HINT!)

Sorry, I know its been a while since I posted. I didn't really have much worth writing about before. Still don't really. Will keep you updated on Seth. (We shall call him Seth until I find out his name).

Love

Last night I had a dream that a DNA replication fork was sliding down a ramp losing energy to non-conservative forces with uk and...

2005-10-26T13:14:00.000-07:00

I had Physics and Genetics midterms today. From 5am I haven't stopped moving (lifeguarding, then school). I look so incredibly hot from the lack of sleep, you have no idea.

Sleep is something I really need to do right now. I'll nap and then do Microb and then Choir exec meeting then supper? then choir then Physics pre-lab, and does it ever end?

What to do when your boyfriend breaks up with you.

2005-10-20T16:15:00.000-07:00

1. Try to remain calm.

Excessive shouting, screaming, and swearing will not help the situation, and may only prove to him that you really are histerical and irrational.

2. Make sure you are clear on why you broke up, and if in fact it is a permanent break up rather than just a break.

It is essential to talk things over in depth. Although it may seem more satisfying now to throw things or beat him up, its really better in the long run to have some closure on the relationship.

3. It is OK to call (call on) all your best friends at 1am. [To those people who were there for me I can't thank you enough- Mariclaire, Matt, Diane, Amanda, Laura, Hayley, Alastair, Logan, Meghan, Dave, Nate, Katie, Mark, Mary-Ellen, Jess, Brandy, Brendan, Daniel, Jun, Lori, Taslim and of course Rabe. Wow... I have a lot of close friends. EFF this is fun. And all of you who offered to beat him up... thanks, but no... he's a delicate choir boy (sorry I couldn't help it) and we wouldn't want him to end up in the hospital. You know, paperwork and none of us have a lot of time. lol]

4. Decide if you two can remain friends.

If the thought of spending "friend" time with him makes you want to vomit into your own mouth, then at the moment you probably need some space. Surround yourself with your good friends (like the aforementioned list) and you'll feel less of a void.
Or, if being friends is central to your relationship, then it should happen naturally. Try not to force it. (If you read this, Rob, I'm confident we'll be fine).

What to do if you wake up with someone whose name you don't know.

2005-10-15T18:38:00.000-07:00

1. Do not guess at the name.

Use acceptable terms of endearment such as "Honey," "Baby," or "Gorgeous."

2. Locate your date's wallet and sneak a glance at his or her ID.

Do not go through any belongings unless you are certain you have ample time and will not get caught.

3. Ask leading questions while making small talk.

This is a risky maneuver, but cam be successful. Ask if your date ever had a nickname. The answer may be, "No, everyone has always called me [Name]."

4. As the two of you say goodbye, ask to exchange business cards.

If your date doesn't have one, say, "Please jot down your name and number on mine." This could also be risky, but may necessary as a last resort.

Fitting into a Major Groove. (hehe... I heart DNA)

2005-10-10T12:51:00.000-07:00

Unless your obsession with DNA is at least equal to mine, you likely won't get that.

I would also like to point out that I am possibly the most hottest nerd I know, and that you should keep that in mind whilst reading the next paragraph. Although I be nerdy, just try to imagine me being really hot while writing this, obviously with a bikini on or soemthing, because obviously I study in swim attire...

Over the past few days, I've definately been fitting into that major groove, except for when it decides to replicate or has a particularly high Guanine-cytosine concentration, with a higher Tm coincidentally due to the base-pair stacking and the triple H-bond, and forms the Z-configuration and then the helix goes in a backwards, left-handed configuration with totally screws everything up. Fortunately there are other proteins (and then proteins that regulate and create the proteins that regulate the transcription and translation of these aforementioned proteins) that specially bind in the Z-configuation, and topoisomerase I and II (although he is greedy and requires ATP) to sort everything out. The polymerases (of both the DNA and RNA variety, in the I II and III forms) are generally pretty good at figuring out the rest of the mess with their 3'-5' exonuclease proofreading capabilities.

My head hurts.

And in other news, this is what I have done with my Thanksgivind weekend. So sad; yet, so true. Midterms in Eukaryotic Cell and Biochemistry are on Tuesday and Wednesday respectively, and therefore I've been in a hole ie. reading my textbooks this whole weekend. I did talk to some very important people on the phone, and saw some other very important people. Other equally important people I would have like to talk to or hang out with but they were in charge of zoos and other misc. and arduous tasks etc. My nephew was baptised so now the sister and I are both God-mothers of our 2nd oldest brothers progeny. [WTF beckie, progeny is such a Genetics word... you know there's something seriously wrong when...]. Turkey is tonight, then... a hot study party with Hayley's boyfriend and a couple of other guys. I heart bio, ergo, I heart my bio boys, no offense Robbie. You'll do.

Go with the groove.

Here's to no sleep!

Cheating on Cameron (Library)

2005-09-30T15:18:00.000-07:00

Dear Cameron (Library),

We need to talk.

I realise we haven't seen each other much lately. In fact I think I only saw you 3 times this week. And even then, twice I brought friends with me. We've had barely any "us" time at all.

Its hard to say what has brought about this change, when long ago I swore my devotion to you. Just know that I'm heartbroken and destroyed in a way that I've never been before.

Please know that I care very deeply about you still, especially your 3rd floor. I just can't see you tonight. One night: four parties, how am I supposed to accomplish this, I don't honestly know.

We can give it a try again next week, Cam. I have some midterms in two weeks, so I'll be working on memorizing the entirety of Eukaryotic Cell and Biochemistry up until this point. Thanks for always being there for me, in exactly the same spot. If you wern't I'd be seriously concerned.

Yours, Prokaryotically, Empirically, and Genetically

Beckie.

How did this happen?

2005-09-23T16:21:00.000-07:00

Sorry, I will now explain how this happened.

Nothing in particular is wrong, but I was actually wondering how I am so far behind in school already. Apparently I've been really distracted in the past few weeks. *shakes fist at Beethoven concert and boyfriend*

Although life be busy, it be fun.

How to deal with a drunken date.

2005-09-16T14:15:00.000-07:00

1. Avoid confrontation.

2. Keep your date standing.

provide support as needed, but if you are incapable of doing so, sit him or her down and call a taxi

3. Lead your date out into the air.

Oxygen helps to reduce drunkenness.

4. Vomiting purges the stomach and prevents more alcohol from entering the bloodstream. Make sure your date rehydrates after purging.

5. Prevent choking.

Always turn your date into the recovery position. (Go lifeguarding!)

6. Watch for alcohol poisoning.

Signs include tremors, unresponsiveness, unconsciousness, and lack of breathing or irregular breathing. Activate necessary emergency medical personal.

___________________________________________________________________

Today was so much fun. I learned about the Lac operon and promotors and enhances and silencers in three classes. Its so great! B-galactoside permease is the coolest enzyme ever.

And if you don't care about gene regulation, then I don't care about you.

How to determine the gender of your date.

2005-09-11T14:37:00.000-07:00

1. Look at his or her hand.

A man's ring finger is usually conspicuously longer than the index finger, wheras a wonan's ring and index fingers are close to the same length. Most me will have visible, dark hair on their hands, wrists, and/or knuckles.

2. Be suspicious of baggy clothing, a tool of concealment.

3. Look in the middle of your target's neck for an Adam's apple.

Most men have them; most women do not.

4. Observe shoulders and hips.

Men's shoulders tend to be broader than their hips, while women's hips and shoulders tend to be closer to the same width.

5. Follow your target up a flight of stairs.

Men tend to walk in a more "straight ahead" motion. Women tend to sway a bit from side to side and lean forward slightly.

__________________________________________________________________

School is going pretty well, even though I have a lot of homework already. Its going to be a crazy year, but I've made some intense study groups/study partners, so hopefully I can be nerdy with company.

I have to go back to learning the identifying features of Drosophila melanogaster (the fruit fly) for my genetics lab. You see, we have to identify their genders too. Its a bit different than with humans, because you cannot follow a fly up the stairs. Instead we look for a set of seven dorsal stripes along the length of the female, a black patch on the posterior dorsal abdomen of the male, and get this, sex combs on the first legs of the male.

My name is Rebecca, but you can call me... Tonight

2005-09-04T16:15:00.000-07:00

The last few days have been really weird. I moved away (tear, sob, choke!), and into the hott and exclusive new residence (Woot!), and have become an Official Orientation Volunteer Leader (or something along those lines). For more info talk to Matt, the hero of all things Pirate (at this point I should mention that Rob is also a Pirate). YEAH!

To explain, each faculty has a different theme: Science is Superheros, Engineering is Pirates, Arts is Martial Arts, etc. My group of Orientation Leaders is getting capes, like all good superheros. We are all such nerds to the nth degree, but whatever. Its weird having school spirit, or faculty spirit, I suppose. I remember nothing of last year, but I definitely don't remember it like this in high school. The best part? We have hott orange T-shirts! So bright, and soooo beautiful.

How to Survive If You Run into Your Ex.

2005-08-31T19:10:00.000-07:00

1. Do not avert your gaze.

When you keep someone's gaze, you keep control.

2. Take control of the conversation.

Start by mentioning something that you noticed earlier in the day or en route to the event. Avoid complimenting or talking about the ex. Enthusiasm is key; it will help you appear unfazed by the encounter.

3. If you are with adate, introduce him or her and send clear signals that this is who you are with now.

4. Keep the conversation short and sweet. If this is not possible and you are without a date suddenly develop a severe headache/food poisioning incident. If this is not possible, text message a friend and get them to call you. Then, citing an "emergency" leave. [Note: this is only a last resort, as your friend may not get to call you, or may be annoyed with you.]

Do you have a Band-Aid? 'Cause I skinned my knee when I fell for you.

2005-08-30T10:01:00.000-07:00

Last night involved a fun-filled evening and a three hour phone conversation [damn! that's a long time].

Moving in on Friday. Friday! That's three days from now, and I'm not nearly ready. Oh well, there's nothing like sheer panic to motivate you when nothing else will. I am excited to have a new room all to myself plus a bathroom, minus last year's scary roommate and her creepy boyfriend [shudder].

My mother of all people bought me a blow-up mattress [its really nice] for anybody who wishes to stay over at my place next year. Let me know beforehand if you plan to crash, because, well, although it is nice we don't want 6 people sleeping on it at once. Or do we?

HEY!

2005-08-29T18:57:00.000-07:00

So this is my blog for second year, inspired by many things including Coldplay and "The Worst-Case Scenario Dating & Sex Address Book".

So, one might ask, how does one determine if her date is an Axe Murderer?

1. Watch for the Following:

Is your date a Caucasian male in his twenties or therites?
Is he obsessed with fire or matches?
Is he visibly cruel to animals?
Does he exhibit loner behavior and have trouble maintaining relationships? [sound familiar? dare I suggest any number of names here?]

2. Trust your intuition:

If something feels wrong, it probably is.

3. Check him out officially:

Obtain his social insurance number to determine if he was ever incarcerated.

4. Break off the relationship immediately-but do not blame him. Try not to make him angry.